Monday, March 23, 2009

YUCK: sticky substance, goo, ooze, crud, slush

I have been sitting here all day at work, thinking about all the hurts and cries of desperation that have been shared with me over the past several months. It has made me open some doors that I had closed. I had to look back at my past yuck and ugliness that I went through. It also reminded me how much our life journeys make us who we are today.

Even when we had to muck around in it for a season. Even when we feel our sludge is worse than anyone else has ever felt. It makes you feel you will never get over your yuck, or that God will never forgive because it is so messy and ugly.

At a recent retreat I had the pleasure of attending I was able to hear the DVD series "Loving Well" by Beth Moore. Beth made this comment.

This small sentence that she spoke says so much in what I have been hearing from young women of all ages, from all types of backgrounds. Whether she is a stay at home mom or a career women with a family. We are hurting. Sadly we do not know how to heal that hurt. We do not know how to feel well loved. We live in a world where we want instant gratification, we still feel empty. I am guilty of this in many ways I fail and fall because of this. In a world where we have so much and we throw so much away, we feel unfullfilled, we tire of it. Sound famaliar to you?

It also seems to me we hear the same message over and over again. Keep on praying, keep on trusting, keep on reading his word. Stay strong, believe. Stay involved with church, stay in a relationship with Christian women who love the Lord. I can really understand how this would become so old to anyone that is hurting and not feeling well loved. Can you? How can this help?

When we are hurting it is not really the time we want to here all the same old platitudes. I was reminded of this during a conversation with my sister. I had gotten on my Chrisitan high horse and told her what she should do. Instead of loving on her and praying with her. It helped me realize the answer to that message of feeling well loved. We can feel that way when we love some one well.

1st Colossians 1:11

As you learn more and more how God works, you will learn how to do your work. (The Message)

I for one am going to use this verse when I am not feeling well loved. As a reminder. When I do not feel like doing what God ask me to do, and I am tired of hearing it. I pray I will be strong enough to do it so I can love on others to help me feel well loved.

He loves you so,


Wednesday, March 18, 2009


How can you explain the holy spirit in regards to having a relationship with our Father God to someone who is hurting? I was thinking about this on my way to work this morning . So many people have shared with me how they feel so lost, not worthy and not close to our Daddy, during the past several months. Some not even having a relationship at all. My thoughts took me to thinking about the holy spirit as being a flashlight and this what came to me.

It is in the way God has given me my heart, my life verse Jeremiah 29:11. God our Father said He knows the plans, (situations, events, outcomes, life experiences and passions, and past) he has for US. God also said he has plans to prosper Us. (we can define prosper in so many ways other than money) health, jobs, the love of family, and definitely children and grandchildren, He wants to give US hope and a future. The future to do what He calls us to do. I had to read it again to see if it says we need to first be perfect. Wow I didn't see that. Seek Him is what the next verse states, (Jesus).

So what does a flashlight have to do with the above thoughts? A flashlight can be light or dark. This is the hope and the future he sent us to use as a guide (the holy spirit). If you had the choice of going into a dark room with or without a flashlight, not knowing what was there, what would you choose? I would choose going with the flashlight, why?

I choose to seek, what God wants of me. Light....not darkness. How? Through getting on my face and knees as much as I can. Lots of tears because I am not worthy to be His princess. Prayer, asking my Abba for guidance, wisdom and the desire for obedience. With God, Jesus and His flashlight. His sword the Bible, Jeremiah 29:11 has become so real to me. My prayers for you are seek Him, cry out to him, He hears you even if you don't think he doesn't . Also remember dear ones this is not something that happens over night. I for one am imperfect but still so loved by Him. It took me a long time to come to this realization. It seems like such a simple explaination, I know we are the ones that make it hard to comprehend.

Rest in Him. Love Debi