Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Tulips and Smiles

Even though spring seems to be having a hard time deciding what it actually wants to do as far as temperature and sunshine, it is still beautiful. We have been able to enjoy everything turning green and dots of color popping out all over. The trees are blooming cascades of flowers that when the sun shines on them they seem so brilliant. My tulips this year seem to be exploding with such vibrant colors, I don't remember them being this beautiful. I even gathered them and placed them in the house to enjoy. Having flowers in the house can lift you up. For some odd reason picking my own flowers has always been hard for me. Yet it doesn't bother me to go to a store and buy a bouquet of flowers to enjoy. I know I am strange.

How God thought and spoke the seasons into being is totally amazing and mind boggling. There was snow on some of my flowers in April. Patience is not one of my virtues so I thought I would never be able to get outside and dig in the dirt. Our winter seemed never ending.

Maybe that is why it seems God is letting us all see a little extra in the beauty of His artwork. Or maybe I never really payed attention to it as carefully as I have this spring. Why is it I forget that God is the one who gave me the desire to plant, grow and create beauty out of a tiny seed? Why do I take this for granted? It is a gift, and like all the gifts He gives us He desires us to use them. We are not supposed to sit and let them slowly die from lack of our tending them.

I think this was one of my "growing up" whispers from God. He laid on my heart women's ministry and mentoring. He didn't put this desire to be used inside of me without giving me the tools I needed to use this gift. God nurtured me, He also showed me the mentors that I had in my life that helped me to seek Him. He has placed key woman in my life to make me accountable. He gave me a thirst for a relationship with Jesus. Our Father knew I would not let go of myself without a struggle. God asked me to give up "wordly" things to pursue Him. He knew how hard it would be for me. He opened the doors and led me down the paths He wanted me to walk on. Since I can be so dense and stubborn God had to put his "gloves" on at times to pull out the weeds, my hurts were deep rooted. I have a thorn like Paul as a reminder.

I still have to remember to ask each day for the living water our Father offers us, His nourishment. Every day I have to ask for mercy and grace, so the weeds won't spread and grow.

The beauty of all of it, is what I have realized through all of Gods planting, and this makes me smile. Our Abba showers me "abundantly" with His blessings when I let our Father control my "garden gifts."

I pray that you will all see His beauty through what ever you may be going through. Let God use you and nourish your gifts. Let His healing rain embrace you. Let His light shine on you and nourish you to grow in Him and for Him. Remember His words.

Psalm 66:5

Take a good look at God's wonders- they'll take your breath away.

The Message

He loves you so,

Friday, April 17, 2009


Hi everyone.

This past week has been a very tough week for me. I have been home sick and it has not been much fun. The hard part for me is the feeling of helplessness. Also being sick is such a waste of my busy time. How selfish of me huh? God knows what we all need both spiritually, mentally and physically. I guess I needed to slow down and just be for a few days.

Today during my quiet time with God he reminded me of a Bible study I did awhile ago. This came at a time when I was praying to be used and asking God what direction He wanted to use me in. He answered that prayer. He even gave me guidelines through this study as a reminder of exactly what God will do for (me) us if we just ask. I thought I would share this with you.

Jeremiah 31:3-34 NIV

V3 . I have loved you with an everlasting love: GOD WILL GIVE US AN EVERLASTING LOVE

V4. I will build you up again: GOD WILL BUILD US UP AGAIN

V5. Again you will plant vineyards on the hills of Samaria; the farmers will plant them and enjoy their fruit: GOD WILL MAKE US FRUITFUL AND TAKE CARE OF OUR HEALTH.

V6. There will be a day when watchmen cry out: GOD WILL WATCH OVER US.

V7. Oh Lord, Save your people: GOD WILL SAVE US.

V8. See, I will bring them from the land of the north and gather them from the ends of the earth: GOD WILL RESTORE US.

V10. He who scattered Israel will gather them and will watch over his flock like a shepherd: GOD WILL SHEPHERD US.

V11. For the Lord will ransom Jacob and redeem them from the hand of those stronger than they: GOD WILL REDEEM US.

V12. They will rejoice in the bounty of the Lord: GOD WILL BLESS US .

V13. I will turn their mourning into gladness I will give them comfort and joy : GOD WILL COMFORT US AND GIVE US JOY.

V14. I will satisfy the priests with abundance, and my people will be filled with my bounty: GOD WILL SATISFY US.

V16. This is what the Lord says: "Restrain your voice from weeping and your eyes from tears, for your work will be rewarded," declares the Lord: GOD WILL REWARD US .

V17. "So there is hope for your future," declares the Lord: GOD WILL GIVE US HOPE AND A FUTURE.

V18. You disciplined me like and unruly calf, and I have been disciplined: GOD WILL DISCIPLINE US.

V20. "I still remember him. Therefore my heart yearns for him; I have great compassion for him." GOD REMEMBERS US AND WILL SHOW US COMPASSION AND FORGIVE US.

I know that some of you have been struggling with situations in your life that are out of control. You don't understand the whys. Your heart breaks because you feel there is never going to be an end. Some of you are angry and are unable to forgive or ask for forgiveness. I know you even feel that you are not worthy of Gods love. I have been there dear one. I have walked that long road of finding His redeeming love for me. I am still walking that road, step by step.

So I ask this of you, that this week in your quiet time with God pray this scripture back to yourself. Remember God is there to meet you where you are and on your terms, He loves you that much. He is there to meet all your needs. All He asks of us is to have an open and willing heart to receive what GOD WILL do for us.

He loves you so,

Friday, April 10, 2009


Tonight I went to a dramatization at a small church in our community of The Last Supper. It was a revised version written by Ernest K. Emurian.

What did I learn about the Last Supper? What did I learn about the 12 disciples? I found out that they were just men loving our Jesus. They all had careers, families, worries.

One of them was about to betray Him. One of them was about to disown Christ. All of them will fall away from Him.

Matthew 26 31b

I will strike the shephard, and the sheep of the flock will be scattered. NIV

As I sat there and listened to each portrayal of The Last Supper I was reading program they had provided. It listed the disciples, and who they were. They had written brief biographies of each disciple. One that stood out to me was Thaddaeus.

They listed him as: Thaddaeus: nothing more is known of him

Do you find this sad? Nothing is known of him. Think about it. He chose to follow Christ and nothing was known of him After I came home I was thinking about this analogy and my heart rejoiced in this. It was really not a sad biography of Thaddaeus.

Our Father God knew Thaddeus, He REALLY knew him. He knew all about his life, his hurts and his heart. He knew his fears as he sat with Jesus during the last supper. He knew that Thaddeus loved him, He knew that Thaddaeus believed Jesus was the Messiah, without question. Jesus also knew that he wanted a closer relationship with Him. The best part was, He knew that Thaddeus would not betray him.

I think that is a lot of knowing, and not a lot of not knowing. The knowing that Thaddaeus realized this:

John 3:16
For God (our daddy) so LOVED the world that He gave His one and ONLY begotten Son. That whoever believes in Him shall NOT perish but have eternal life.

This is what that Last Supper was really all about. God gave us 12 disciples to read about in His word. They wrote about Jesus. They gave us a living Jesus.

When you are feeling like a Thaddaues, that nothing more is known about you . Remember this verse. God gave His SON for us. because of His love for us. I know God did not think Thaddues as a nothing. I also know by His word how much Abba God thinks of you. I pray that John 3:16 will become real to you. I pray that you will come to know the KNOWING Father.

He loves you so,

love, debi

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

sometimes I just feel.................

Dear Ones:
Do you ever have those days when you feel like having an "a conceited attitude" (hormones)? I do. I recently went through a few days when I was angry with everything and everyone. I was even angry at the dog. I felt so depressed with life. The person I was really angry at the most was God. It was so senseless and so conceited of me. Doesn't His word show us to have love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control type of attitude?
Galatians 5 22-26

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other. NIV

I didn't want to walk in His word. I didn't want to be kind, good, or gentle. I didn't want to show self-control. When I remembered this scripture it just made me want to stomp my feet and yell "Let me BE this way for awhile" UGLY, selfish, mean spirited. uncontrolled and just darn well unlikable to everyone. I think I would have even kicked the dog too. OUCH. Our Father loves us so much, but He does not give us permission to be ugly just because our hormones are racing. PMS and menopause have been used to excuse our behaviours for to long. I am very guilty of this.

Read the scripture again. Wow! Do you see the difference in how the words even roll off your tongue? Say kindness out loud. Come on don't be shy, KINDNESS. Now say MEAN SPIRITED out loud. Do this with all the words. See how God even made His word sound so much sweeter to our souls, hearts, and on our tongue. The ugly words sure can help you not walk in His SPIRIT, just by speaking them and thinking them.

Another reminder that we need to hide His word in our hearts, another reminder what our Father calls us to be. LIKE HIM. Even through the times we struggle with an "attitude" even when we don't want to be like Him. Lets be honest we have all felt this way. That is why it is so much easier to sin. It feels good, for the moment. Thank God we have the hope His Spirit fills us with.

When you have a real bad day because your kids will not mind and are always fighting with there siblings. When your husband hoards the remote and you have to watch one more sports show. Or he rolls his eyes at you when you tell him you are tired and would he put the kids to bed tonight. His attitude showed, "You were home all day what did you do?" Grrrrrr. When everything that could go wrong goes wrong. The toilet floods, because your dear son/daughter flushed his diaper down it. When the bills pile up and throwing them on the floor and paying the ones that land up first is not working anymore. You wonder how you are going to make it one more month. When your boss at work gives you a pink slip. Or the boss at work seems to not appreciate you, and it made you feel so small.

Take these words in Galatians speak them OUT LOUD, yell them if you have too. Remember how much sweeter His word is when we have an ugly (hormonal) day. Memorize these words so they are right near your heart. It seems when I have the "a conceited attitude" even if I can't remember all the words I can come up with at least one I can yell out.

Once again God has helped me get through, I may not have liked it. Once again I had to fall on my knees and ask for forgiveness. I may not have liked His correction. What I do know is that God is in control. As long as I keep on trusting Him. Every time I feel His love reach out to me and hold me in His arms, He still holds Me, Debi, selfish, hormonal and a very slow learner with His fruits of the Spirit.
He loves you so,

love, debi

Monday, March 23, 2009

YUCK: sticky substance, goo, ooze, crud, slush

I have been sitting here all day at work, thinking about all the hurts and cries of desperation that have been shared with me over the past several months. It has made me open some doors that I had closed. I had to look back at my past yuck and ugliness that I went through. It also reminded me how much our life journeys make us who we are today.

Even when we had to muck around in it for a season. Even when we feel our sludge is worse than anyone else has ever felt. It makes you feel you will never get over your yuck, or that God will never forgive because it is so messy and ugly.

At a recent retreat I had the pleasure of attending I was able to hear the DVD series "Loving Well" by Beth Moore. Beth made this comment.

This small sentence that she spoke says so much in what I have been hearing from young women of all ages, from all types of backgrounds. Whether she is a stay at home mom or a career women with a family. We are hurting. Sadly we do not know how to heal that hurt. We do not know how to feel well loved. We live in a world where we want instant gratification, we still feel empty. I am guilty of this in many ways I fail and fall because of this. In a world where we have so much and we throw so much away, we feel unfullfilled, we tire of it. Sound famaliar to you?

It also seems to me we hear the same message over and over again. Keep on praying, keep on trusting, keep on reading his word. Stay strong, believe. Stay involved with church, stay in a relationship with Christian women who love the Lord. I can really understand how this would become so old to anyone that is hurting and not feeling well loved. Can you? How can this help?

When we are hurting it is not really the time we want to here all the same old platitudes. I was reminded of this during a conversation with my sister. I had gotten on my Chrisitan high horse and told her what she should do. Instead of loving on her and praying with her. It helped me realize the answer to that message of feeling well loved. We can feel that way when we love some one well.

1st Colossians 1:11

As you learn more and more how God works, you will learn how to do your work. (The Message)

I for one am going to use this verse when I am not feeling well loved. As a reminder. When I do not feel like doing what God ask me to do, and I am tired of hearing it. I pray I will be strong enough to do it so I can love on others to help me feel well loved.

He loves you so,


Wednesday, March 18, 2009


How can you explain the holy spirit in regards to having a relationship with our Father God to someone who is hurting? I was thinking about this on my way to work this morning . So many people have shared with me how they feel so lost, not worthy and not close to our Daddy, during the past several months. Some not even having a relationship at all. My thoughts took me to thinking about the holy spirit as being a flashlight and this what came to me.

It is in the way God has given me my heart, my life verse Jeremiah 29:11. God our Father said He knows the plans, (situations, events, outcomes, life experiences and passions, and past) he has for US. God also said he has plans to prosper Us. (we can define prosper in so many ways other than money) health, jobs, the love of family, and definitely children and grandchildren, He wants to give US hope and a future. The future to do what He calls us to do. I had to read it again to see if it says we need to first be perfect. Wow I didn't see that. Seek Him is what the next verse states, (Jesus).

So what does a flashlight have to do with the above thoughts? A flashlight can be light or dark. This is the hope and the future he sent us to use as a guide (the holy spirit). If you had the choice of going into a dark room with or without a flashlight, not knowing what was there, what would you choose? I would choose going with the flashlight, why?

I choose to seek, what God wants of me. Light....not darkness. How? Through getting on my face and knees as much as I can. Lots of tears because I am not worthy to be His princess. Prayer, asking my Abba for guidance, wisdom and the desire for obedience. With God, Jesus and His flashlight. His sword the Bible, Jeremiah 29:11 has become so real to me. My prayers for you are seek Him, cry out to him, He hears you even if you don't think he doesn't . Also remember dear ones this is not something that happens over night. I for one am imperfect but still so loved by Him. It took me a long time to come to this realization. It seems like such a simple explaination, I know we are the ones that make it hard to comprehend.

Rest in Him. Love Debi